Anime is BLASPHEMY: March 2006

Saturday, March 25, 2006

Kiki's Delivery service

I know what all you people are thinking, "Rabbit-man Kiki's delivery service is a movie for girls, why the heck did you watch it?", Well uhh lets see the answer is that....the movie was made by Hayao Miyazaki, and I was expecting all sorts of blood and violence, and all that other stuff that real men like me like. YEAH I think I'm gonna go kill some stuff right now, give me a second....

Visual Quality-20 points. If any of you people haven't figured it out already, I, Rabbit-man really like the movies animated by studio Ghibli, and directed by Hayao Miyazaki. For me to give this movie anything less than 20 points would be blasphemy....wait this blog is called anime is blasphemy....shit.....Well anyway the character designs are pretty cool, and the animation is very fluid. I was really surprised with how good this movie looks, it was made in 1989, seriously look at some American stuff from that time, most of it is crap in comparison to this.

Plot-34 points. This is a pretty simple movie, the story revolves around a young witch living in an unfamiliar place, while trying to mature into an adulthood. Unlike many of Miyazaki's other more epic movies, this one consists of many "episodic" scenes, there is no bad guy (not that there are well defined bad guys in any of Miyazaki's movies, except for that lupin the III one), or an overarching plot. This can be a good thing, because many of those epic movies miyazaki tend to be hastily/badly resolved, see Howl's moving castle, but this one has a nice satisfying ending. That gets this movie some bonus points in my book.

Characters-29 points. All of the characters are well developed here. The movie mainly focuses on Kiki and her cat, but the supporting characters are sufficiently represented here. Miyazaki is an admitted feminist, and it is fairly obvious in this movie. There are only 3 main male characters, and only one has more than a few lines.

Music- 10 points. This movie has some pretty good music, but I have heard better in the other Ghibli movies. I liked many of the italian sounding pieces in this though.

Visual Quality-20 points, Plot-34 points, Characters-29 points, Music- 10 points

Overall score- 93 points

Sunday, March 12, 2006

Howl's Moving Castle

Alright, I have wanted to see this movie ever since it was first released theatrically in English. In fact my quest to see Howl's was one of anguish and torment. I show up at the god*** theater and what does the clerk say, "No this is a special screening, you have to have a pass to see this." What the hell, I was never told of this pass. So I say to the clerk, "Listen theater-slave, this is America, a free country, if I want to see this movie I can!!" To which the clerk replies, "You f***ng idiot, this is England". So I left dejected, and suicidal, and had to wait for the DVD release.
So after a couple of months the DVD came out, and I watched it, and all I have to say is WOW.

Hayao Miyazaki, the master animator has returned to film-making, after another brief retirement, to direct what may be his final production, and he pulls no punches in this installment. So how did it do, huh, huh, HUH!!!???

Visual Quality- 23 points. Now I know what you all are thinking, "HEY RABBIT-MAN VISUAL QUALITY IS ONLY WORTH 20 POINTS, AND YOU GAVE THIS 23. WHAT'S UP WITH THAT?" TO WHICH I WOULD REPLY "SHUT THE HELL UP, I'M IN CHARGE OF THIS NOW LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!" So if anyone has read vicious dreamer's review (it's right below this one go ahead, after you read this), you saw that extra points can be given, if the reviewer says so, TYRANNY DAMNIT TYRANNY. This movie looks awesome, everything moves so smoothly, and the castle looks amazing. This, quite possibly , could be Hayao Miyazaki's last film, and Studio Ghibli wanted to pull out all the stops for his swansong. The character designs are awesome as usual, and the main female character, Sophie, happens to look different from the classic Miyazaki female character (which is a good thing, creativity, nothing wrong with the original character designs).

Plot-28 points. This is where the whole movie falls apart. I was digging the beginning, and as the time began to pass by, I wondered, how the hell are they gonna finish this. Well shortly after I thought this all hell broke loose, and every plot point was solved, IN LIKE 3 SECONDS. What the hell? The ending is pretty much the only flaw in this movie, because it was freaking rushed, and it just didn't make sense. Also some relationships could be explored, possibly to explain the sudden romance that popped out of nowhere.

Characters- 28 points. I have no faults at all with the characters in this movie. They are all pretty cool, and developed about as well as they can be in a movie, DAMN TIME CONSTRAINTS. Wow I am really using some foul language, all right from here on in no more. So why did I take off that one point...Oh yeah, that scarecrow guy, I just didn't like him, it would be a spoiler if I said why though.

Music-9 points. Yeah I liked the music, it was pretty cool, I don't have much else to say about it.

Overall score-88

So I have graded this better than Mononoke, before you all attack me remember, that the gorgeous visuals are what gave Howl's such a good grade.

Edit: I changed the grade on this movie, it wasn't sitting well with me, it was a 92, and I think I misadded originally. I HATE YOU BASIC MATH!!!!

Edit: The mononoke grade has been increased, ignore the previous comment, and read the mononoke review

Monday, March 06, 2006

Triplettes of Belleville

All right, folks. I know anime has a connotative value for only Japanese animations, but believe it or not, other country makes animations too. It's a shocking news for some, no? This animation that I will talk about is actually French, with American satire. But fear not, there are no French spoken during the film. In fact, nothing is said throughout the movie. And yet, it's voice is pure as a toilet bowl that has been just cleaned...WITH YOUR TONGUE.

Let us commence:
Visual quality- the drawing is not clear, and it has a sense of shaded, gloomy tone. It's exactly what it should have. The scenery is nicely drawn, with a sense of surrealism. The characters are drawn with an overly exaggerated posture. There is a transition from old style (mickey mouse style) to more modern, realistic and somewhat depressing art. I would, in the end, give it a 16. The only problem is that the IT WOULD CREEP THE HELL OUT OF YOU IF YOU WOULD SEE IT FOR THE FIRST TIME..But it's art. One of the coolest scene in here is when the old lady threw in a grenade into a pond to go fishing. That scene would make you go: That was the coolest scene! (Actually, that's not the coolest scene. I would tell you, but if I did, I'd get my ass kicked by the producers for ruining the story) (Not that I can't whoop them back or anything...)

Plot: There really isn't much of a plot, and this movie relies mostly on sentimental values rather than story. I mean seriously, I can pretty much sum up the events in this movie in what... one sentence. Yup, you better watch the movie if you think I'm lying. Just go to www.free-movies.com/tripletofbelville to pirate the movie and be cursed by many movie producers for doing such act. Did you click the link? It's fake. Shame on you for trying to download an illegal movie. Anyway, I would give it 36, because it's still damn funny to watch grandmas throwing grenade around. Can't say anymore, because I'll get pummeled by the director.

Characters: Each character is not represented, not developped by dialogues nor actions, but by their physical deformity, and their portrayal through artistic means. For example, the main character's grandson, (the tall skinny guy above) has a gentle soul, and so sensitive, yet is a hardworking man. One scene shows him as a horse like character, as his rides his bicycle like a slave. I give this portion 27, because some of the characterization could have been expanded.

Music. Like I said before, there are no dialogues in the film. Instead, they are replaced by musics that are both different in genres, and also some you have never heard of before. After all, one of the main characters, the triplettes, used to be singers earlier on in the film. The music ranges from classic, to jazz, blues to polka, Italian to French, and that's what makes it work. The most impressive music is done by a Vaccum cleaner, a refrigerator grid, bicycle wheel, and news paper. That is it, and it is one of the awesomest thing you'll ever hear from common household items. For orignality, for creativity, and excellent music that you can hum and whistle by after you finish the movie and going to your friend's dog's funeral, (meaning it's memorable) I would give it a bonus of 13 points.

So, I guess the grand total of this movie would be... 92! Pretty good film. You should check it out!

Friday, March 03, 2006

Neon Genesis Evangelion

So lets see Evangelion......This is probably one of the most enduringly popular anime, ever. It's still huge in Japan, has had like five different DVD releases here, two movies, and it was all aired, in Japan, in 1995-1996. I have to say I really like this show, the plot revolves around how humanity deals with the coming of "angels", (or "apostles" as they are known in Japan) who aren't exactly pleased with humanitys conduct on earth. There are alot of cool pictures of this show, so bear with me, because I want to show alot of them.

So how did it do?

Visual Quality-17 points. The animation studio Gainax did a great job with this show, I really like the character designs. However, after some extreme violence in one of the episodes,and many many many complaints from viewers, the funding for this show was cut, and the animation took a dive after that. Seriously the last two episodes are a bunch of lines, and some crayon drawings. Points are deducted there. Also this show has a lot of fan service, I am not too pleased with this, and the show loses points there also. If you don't know what fanservice is click here, I don't feel like explaining this.
Plot- 38 points. Evangelion starts out as a standard anime, kill the invaders, try to live through a crazy school life, etc, but soon it begins to morph into something alot deeper. The seemingly pleasant facade of the first few episodes, is soon shattered, and things get really dark. Intense graphic violence, disturbing images, and pschological drama all combine to create one really really crazy show. I first saw a little of this show when I was 11, and I was tramatized. Yep anime sure is good for kids to watch....right Kent?

Characters- 27 points. Yeah you know something is kind of wrong when you end up liking the antagonist in the show, and are extremely annoyed with the protagonist. That is how I walked away from this show, and that is where the majority of points are deducted here. However the rest of the characters are really well developed in this show, and that is why it keeps the majority of the points for this category.

Music- 9 points. I really liked the music here, and it ranges from j-pop to classical music to Frank Sinatra, oddly enough. The ending themesong really really REALLY sucks, it is basically a bunch of Japanese actresses singing "Fly me to the moon", and it makes you want to take a sledgehammer, and smash the tv, then your face. In all fairness I would probably be just as bad if I tryed to sing in Japanese.

So how did Evangelion do?