Anime is BLASPHEMY

Amazing Spider-man: Matters of Life and Death-Review

2011-07-08T01:47:00.006-05:00

Ok so this blog will now become a comic book reviewing blog. Yeah I know what you are thinking: "Oh no not this comic book crap. Get back to the anime." Well let me tell you something, the anime reviews weren't happening. I've drifted away from that stuff, kicked the habit, slapped the mule, ridden the donkey to space-camp, if you will. Yep, now I'm in Space camp, and we don't review anime at space camp, we review comics. Always have, always will. To all you people who enjoyed my anime reviews I have this to say: "I'm sorry. Pretend this blog died with your family in that fire you don't want to talk about anymore." AND to all you people who are open to new things I have this to say: "GET OUT! GET OUT YOU PINKO COMMIE SLOBS!! WHY DO YOU ENJOY NEW STUFF?! THINGS WERE GREAT THE WAY THEY WERE!!"

Ok I think that settles things now to get to the reviewings.

This collection continues the run of Dan Slott on Amazing Spider-man, which has been great. This run is being referred to as "Big Time" because Peter Parker has gotten a job with a big time science company, getting paid a shit ton of money to basically design new stuff for his spider-suit. (Mini Review alert!!!) The last run of comics was called "Brand New Day" which was basically a nearly weekly run of issues that culminated in perhaps the greatest Spider-man story ever, "Origin of the Species." That storyline featured a pregnant supervillain that crashes into a cafe where Peter was having dinner then aforementioned supervillain immediately goes into labor. Without ruining things I will just say that Doc Ock delivers the baby, Spider-man snatches the baby away, and then Spidey and the baby are chased through New York by Doc Ock, The Rhino, a bunch of other villains, the police, and the media. It was awesome! (Mini Review Over)

Matters of Life and Death follows the storyline of a bunch of villains who blame J. Jonah Jameson for their shitty lives. JJJ is riding high right now, he is mayor of New York, his estranged father is back in his life, his rekindled his relationship with his ex-wife, his son is an astronaut. To put it bluntly, he has alot to be proud of both personally and professionally, and these supervillains, led by some guy named Smythe and the Scorpion don't like it. So the bad guys decide to attack JJJ and his family, naturally they choose to attack on the day that his son is due to blast off into space, and even more naturally this leads to a scene where Spider-man fights the scorpion on the side of a space shuttle as it is entering orbit. This first story arc is alot of fun, and is full of great moments. The artwork by Stefano Caselli lives up to the strong tradition of excellent artists that has been the norm for Spider-man books for the past couple of years.

Venom stars in the next storyline, with a new host and a new job, G-man. Seeing the new venom, I won't spoil who it is, go on a spy mission is great, but seeing venom lose control and eat a dude later on is even better. Humberto Ramos draws this story, I know his art can be polarizing, but I tend to really enjoy the guy's work.

The final story involves the fallout from somebody dying, again I won't say who, and is drawn by Marcos Martin. It begins with a trippy dream sequence as Peter visits all the people who have died during his career as Spider-man. This issue is one of the best Spider-man stories I have ever read, mostly due to the excellent art by Martin, who is pretty much one of the most creative artists out there.

This leads into Spidey fighting with an insane guy who basically enjoys killing hostages. The police can't stop him, Mayor Jameson wants him dead, and Spider-man is the only guy who can deal with it.

This is the final page to the storyline, which is just amazing.

You should read this.

Chronologically you should read this one after the Grant Morrison Post: He's so dreamy... Wait I like women not men... Rabbit-man is confused :(

2009-10-03T20:39:00.001-05:00

Ok so last column kind of got sidetracked and went to a weird place. Honestly I was trying to write about Grant Morrison’s brilliant run on New X-Men, but once I actually got started talking about Grant Morrison, I started rambling about crap. I mean the guy’s life story is an oscar winning biopic in the making, I swear it. I did a little bit of research about him a while ago, and there is some interesting, and paranoid shit out there, you readers should seriously look for it. Also to complete the night of grand conspiracy theories and paranoia, Look up the Montauk Chair, The Blue moon conspiracy, and Morphic Resonance. Actually just read the first paragraph on this website, the last sentence is probably one of the funniest things ever written on the internet. That Montauk wikipedia article is pretty funny too especially the part where it warns about how the article does not site any of its sources.
Crap! See this is what happens when I talk about Grant Morrison, I start rambling about conspiracy theories. WHY CAN’T I JUST REVIEW NEW X-MEN LIKE I WANTED? WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME.
Ok I think I’ll just settle down by talking about a movie that deals with conspiracy theories, the horrors of aging, and the sadness of being forgotten by the world. Yeah that’s right I’m going to review “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button”! Wait, I didn’t see that crappy movie. I mean Benjamin Button is like 5 and a half hours long, and no one has been able to watch the whole thing through due to how boring it is. Why would I subject myself to that? For the good of my readers who want to know about the movie? Hah that’s funny, maybe if somebody started paying me to write shit then I would review godawful pieces of shite like “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button”. No I’m going to review something that interests me, something like say X-Me—Bubba Ho-tep. Man what a great movie Bubba Ho-Tep was. I mean it had it all conspiracy theories, comments on the horrors of aging and the sadness of being forgotten by the world (Strange I feel like I’m repeating myself here), also it stars an aging Elvis Aaron Presley who teams up with a black guy who thinks he is JFK to fight a mummy. Yeah I know must of you loyal readers who have made it this far into the review probably were already sold based on that sentence alone so I should probably stop here with the review. But TWIST I won’t. I freaking promised to review something in this post, and dammit I am gonna review. Screw the ramifications! So basically Bubba Ho-Tep begins in a most depressing fashion depicting a bedridden Elvis Presley (Played by the amazing Bruce Campbell) trapped in the most horrible old folks home ever. Much time is spent showing how a place like that can just destroy a person, and Elvis is just a big sack of do nothing sadness. It’s a little hard to watch, especially when you think that the movie is supposed to be about Elvis and Black JFK fighting a mummy, but I digress. You see this is a movie about redemption and in order to get anyone to give a flying eff about a hero’s redemption you must first show the depths to which the hero has fallen. The first half of Bubba Ho-Tep concerns itself with that goal, and does a splendid job. Naturally once the plot reaches the turning point the rest of the movie is almost twice as enjoyable because of what came before. Overall I highly recommend this movie, for it’s humor, conspiracy theories, and surprisingly emotionally involving characters. This may be a B-movie, but it’s got more soul than any number of Hollywood blockbusters with 100 times it’s budget. (Crap I’ve been watching too much “How I met your Mother” I mean that show’s hilarious but if you watch it too long you start to think in lame metaphors (by Thor’s hammer that show is filled with lame metaphors, but it is so freaking hilarious that I love it) and even lamer analogies. So please forgive the terrible last sentence (although I would bet it is worthy of the DVD cover all it needs is a few more exclamation points.))
Rabbit-Man out!!

Another Recycled Post: Writer's Block revealed!!

2009-10-03T20:36:00.000-05:00

So I decided to do something different this week and talk about two comic books. Particularly I will be talking about two comic books that I bought at the store. These two comics are Jack Of Fables #35 and Ex Machina #43.
A long time ago I used to buy a whole bunch of weekly comics, mostly Marvel superhero stuff, but I kind of fell out of reading those lately (they have jacked up the price to 3.99 per issue, and they are all interconnected so reading just one is hard), and now I just stick with the Fables series of books and Ex Machina. I think explaining what both of those books are about in one sentence or so will probably make them sound lame, and won’t do the stories justice so I will just skip that part and talk about the specific comics I got.

Jack Of Fables #35
(Note this is part 8 of a continuing story) This issue begins with two hilarious two-page spreads introducing all the characters involved for those unfortunate enough to pick up this issue without reading the first 7 parts of the story. Pretty much everything is hilarious about the first four pages from the character descriptions to the art work. My favorite are the descriptions of the Genre Characters mystery’s description is left blank, SciFi’s is a bunch of technobabble, and Fantasy’s is a bunch of mythical type stuff so convoluted that the author gives up midway through. Also this book has a two page spread of a little girl brutally murdering like 8 people with her bare hands. Yeah you read that right.
This comic book was awesome! Makes me excited to see how this whole thing will be wrapped up in the next installment.

Ex Machina #43

Hopefully with Lost on hiatus Mr. Big Shot Hollywood writer Vaughan will find some time to finish the last seven issues of this awesome comic in a timely manner. Because hell he has gained a name for himself by writing some of the best cliffhangers ever, and the one for the issue before this was brutal. From the first issue of this series we were told that the year 2005 was a disaster for Mayor Hundred, and this storyarc finally begins to reveal just what happened in “goddamned 2005”. So far the mayor’s political career could easily be killed by any of three threats introduced in this storyline, the mysterious box he kept locked away in a safe house, the resurgence of his old archenemy Jack Pherson, or the fact that he has resumed his role as vigilante(!). This is the first storyline to put the main focus on the Superheroics, in all the proceeding chapters the superpowers-related storylines always came second to the political action, and this shuffling up of the series is pretty intriguing. Also I was waiting forever to see more stuff about Pherson who I think is the most interesting part about the whole Ex Machina series. This book deserves full marks by beginning in the most awesome way possible, with the Great Machine facing up to the Zombified mistakes of his past. Yeah you read that right.

Both Jack of Fables #35 and Ex Machina #43 are highly recommended by me, but both of these books continue previous storylines so be sure to catch up before you read either of them.

I already posted this on the other blog: The Tragedy of the recycled post

2009-10-03T20:33:00.002-05:00

Transformers 2 is the story of a severely disturbed young man who retreats into a vivid fantasy life to avoid the trauma of living with two severely mentally handicapped parents. Director Michael Bay presents Sam Witwicky as a great study of a character who has too much responsibility and wishes to escape it all. Clearly Sam is the rock that tethers his deranged parents to reality, and when he gets ready to leave for college, their whole world comes crumbling down. Bay cleverly represents this by having Sam’s childhood home get destroyed by his imaginary robot pals. Bay cuts between scenes of confusing, and poorly thought out fantasy, and heartbreaking family drama, to further play up how much the burden of his mentally retarded parents has affected his life. In one scene of pure cinematic genius Bay reveals how deep Sam has retreated into his rich interior world, by having an enormously attractive woman embrace, and kiss him after his house is destroyed. The brilliant camera work in this scene is what really conveys this retreat, by having the camera repeatedly circle around Sam and his fantasy ideal of a woman, bay begins to create a sickeningly dizzy display of emotion. Many spectators at my screening were beginning to get sick of all the camera rotation around this scene, and I smiled at how Bay got such a visceral, and real reaction from the audience with only his camera work. He is clearly an auteur to be revered.

Like any young man Sam envisions himself as the center of his fantasy world. In Sam’s fantasies he is the Christ like protagonist of some absurd struggle between warring robots. This reflects Sam’s real world responsibility as caretaker of his very very stupid parents. Intercut with heartbreaking scenes of his mother humiliating herself when Sam goes to college, are scenes of Sam rejecting his role as savior of the robots. Clearly this is all a metaphor for Sam rejecting stewardship of his childlike parents. Only when Sam’s fantasy world threatens to implode on itself in a sheer clusterfuck of amazing ridiculousity does he realize that cannot reject his duty of caring for his severely challenged parents.

Bay throws in several hints that Sam may be suffering some mental hangups himself with the portrayal of two grossly offensive illiterate stereotype robots, that seem to poke fun at how White people view Black culture, just by being so inherently thoughtless and offensive. Unfortunately the spectators at my screening seemed to think that these gross stereotypes were funny when they clearly, clearly were annoying and racist. Perhaps Bay can fix this in the just announced 5 hour long director’s cut.

Overall Transformers 2 is an excellent look at the life of a pathetic young man, and his burdensome mentally handicapped parents.

A plea for help.

2009-05-25T14:49:00.003-05:00

Ok I know how to leverage my fame with my fans into something worthwhile
Please click on this link and create a brute to fight my brute. If you do this you will help my dude progress. See you get to help me out isn't that great. If this is the first brute you made with your ip address then my brute will get experience. As far as I can tell there is no other benefit to being the first brute made with a certain IP address. In other words it's the same as making one randomly, and it greatly benefits me.
Also my brute tends to give dogs to it's pupils I created like 13 accounts as pupils for it, and maybe 5 or so have gotten dogs. So if you want your brutes to have dogs you will definitely get them from this guy.

The Best he is at what he does, and what he does is... so terribly pretty!!

2009-05-22T00:53:00.000-05:00

Let me tell you walk you through the last few minutes of your life. First you set your computer to internet, after a few minutes of checking your favorite sites you somehow came across this blog, a blog that has been a barren wasteland for the past year. Just as you are about to leave you notice something. Here are your exact thoughts: “What is this? A new post on the ANIME IS BLASPEHEMY blog! Is it Christmas already? No wait Christmas alone can’t be special enough for something like this, maybe it’s my birthday too! Awesome I get presents now!!!”
Well let me tell you something it ain’t Christmas, and it certainly isn’t your birthday. (Unless if it is Christmas, and your birthday, but there’s like a 1 in 48,000,000 chance of that happening, so the odds are in my favor puny humans. MOO HOO HA HA!!!) Point is neither you nor Jesus was born today, and instead today is special, because I am bringing the fifth column back into style (just like I did with laser tag), and to begin the festivities I am going to write about X-men. Specifically Grant Morrison’s recent take on the x-men. Surely you’ve seen me allude to it before, I think I titled one of my blogs with the name of a storyarc from his new x-men run, and I’ve been dying to encapsulate my thoughts on what he did over the 50 issues of new x-men that he wrote. But I ain’t going to review fifty comics in one post, that would be insane… “right?”
“Yes Rabbit-man that would be insane”
“Thanks Rabbit-man that would be very insane of me to do!”
“Yeah I know I already said that stop repeating yourself”
“Good show you always were quick to catch on to the metatextual jokes weren’t you”
“Yes now shut up, and start writing”

First and foremost I think I should present a brief history of the man who wrote these comics Grant Morrison: aka King Mob, aka The God of Comics. Basically from what I can tell Morrison pretty much lived the life of a straight edge until he reached his thirties at which point he decided to do every drug he could get his hands on. Also he was abducted by aliens in Katmandu. Yeah you read that right, the dude either was or thinks he was abducted by freaking aliens. He also lived as a transvestite for a little while, and basically came up with the idea for the matrix movies at least three years before the first matrix premiered. God forbid, If his life was ever translated into a biopic movie, it would probably win all the Oscars in the world. Needless to say he is either crazy, or everybody but him is insane, and if there is one thing that’s true about writers it’s that the crazier they are the better their work. I mean look at Kafka, or even Emily Dickinson, the both of them obviously had some debilitating self doubt issues, and how about Hunter S. Thompson, or Shakespeare. Ok I don’t know if Shakespeare was crazy, but could a sane person make up as many words as him? I don’t think so. Dude made up like half the freaking English language. He was probably plotting to take over the world too, all he would have to do is get everyone to talk with his words, and then he could control their thoughts. Straight out of 1984 I tells ya. Thank god he died of (quick break to check wikipedia) unknown causes… UNKNOWN CAUSES!?!? What the fuck, the dude invented half the freaking language, and we don’t know how he died. What have historians been doing? JEEZ!
Ok this column ran long, and I didn’t get to reviewing x-men, but don’t worry I’m gonna do it soon. Think of this as the precursor, and next post will be full of x-meny goodness, and wolverine too. Yeah Wolverine. (Actually BOO Wolverine, his movie sucked ass. I mean they screwed up deadpool big time. I guess I can rant about that some other time though.)

NEXT GRANT MORRISON’S WORK ON NEW X-MEN: REVIEWED!?

2008-08-11T21:53:00.001-05:00

Ok people here is a homework assignment.

First off go to this website

Translate it,

and tell me why they referenced my princess mononoke review in the comments.

Metal Gear Solid 4 REVIEW

2008-06-20T00:30:00.013-05:00

The messiah has arrived Playstation fans, your $400-600 purchase of a gaming machine has finally been validated. Last Thursday fans could forget about the only two triumphs of the Playstation 3 brand namely blu-ray discs destroying the HD-dvds and the improved stability that the Playstation 3 has over the xbox 360, and focus on what would surely be one of the most anticipated events in modern history. Yes my friends last thursday Metal Gear Solid 4 descended like an angel from heaven to grace our unworthy home theater systems with its presence. It was time for Kojima productions and Konami to come through for the lowly people who purchased the PS3 for reasons other than the fact that it is a great dvd player. The hardcore PS3 gamer's day had arrived.

However the buildup to thursday was not all sunshine and blowjobs. Prior to the games launch sinister things were being leaked to the interwebs. Rumors like 90 minute cutscenes, and crazy review restrictions that were arbitrarily imposed on early reviews were slowly eating away at the happy facade years of anticipation had lovingly constructed. Was the long wait in vain?

NO! MGS4 dropped on Thursday and proved to be almost as awesome as the crazy hype made it out to be. First I should confess my bias. I can't say that I am a fan of the early MGS games I didn't like the control scheme, and the whole sneaking around thing never appealed to my playing style. Whenever I see a bad guy in a video game I like to kill them with my gun, but this was kinda discouraged in the original metal gear games, because said bad guy would call all of his friends and they would kick my ass. The whole point of MGS is to avoid conflict and sneak around in boxes and shit like that. Fortunately MGS 4 found a way to make sneaking around cool enough for me to enjoy it, by giving the protagonist "old snake" a bad-ass suit that instantly takes on the color of the surrounding area. This new edition allows snake to effectively hide in plain site by lying on the floor, at which point his suit will adopt the color scheme of said floor providing excellent camouflage and if you hide well enough the badguys won't notice you allowing for the whole sneaking around thing to take place (See I am really clever aren't I?).

In the game Solid Snake inexplicably seems to have aged about fifty years, and decided to grow a badass mustache to compliment his newly grayed hair. It's cool to have a geriatric protagonist for a game, at least if it isn't cool it certainly is kind of unique. Fortunately for the player snake seems to have grown a few extra layers of steel underneath his loose wrinkly skin because he has become a lot harder to kill than his previous incarnations (look I tried to play the other games but I kept dying really easily I am ashamed to admit). In addition to this MGS 4 has a much better control scheme adapting a control scheme similar to most shooters nowadays, but oddly enough no cover system is utilized in this game, which would have been a great help in some of the harder difficulties.

Before you buy MGS4 you need to consider your gaming preferences, Answer this: would rather watch a gorgeous cutscene depicting a fight, or actually play through said fight yourself. Your answer will probably determine how much you like this game. IT should be no surprise to anyone that this game will have alot of cutscenes and some of them take over an hour to finish, the ending is close to that ninety minute mark which was thrown about in early romors or at least the ending seemed really long to me. However these cutscenes manage to tell a coherent story, and even add some emotional stakes to the whole experience so they can be forgiven because they contribute to the greater experience of the game. I have to say that in retrospect I am impressed with how much I cared about what would happen to Snake by the end of the game, especially since i am a newbie to the whole MGS franchise, and the first time that I even heard of Snake was when he was announced as a playable character in Super Smash Bros. Brawl. A couple of days before I got the game I watched gametrailer's excellent retrospective series on the metal gear games which told enough of the backstory for me to understand the plot of MGS4 even though I am pretty sure that the story it tells is pretty self contained. The only thing which bothered me was the extensive exposition about the bosses after I fought and defeated them. I mean I really don't give a flying frack if the person I just killed was traumatized as a child, and if I was supposed to care then maybe the game should have told me that crap before I fought them to maybe create some sort of emotional conflict when I am shooting like fifty bullets in their face! I am sure eventually even the stupidest player will realize after the first two boss fights that they are going to hear the life story of the other bosses they kill so maybe that emotional conflict will exist later, but just flooding the player with expositional dialogue without accompanying images or explosions gets a little boring. Note I am being kind of vague here on purpose so as not to spoil anybody who hasn't played the game yet. When the game does go into full on cutscene mode you can expect beautiful animation and superb acting though. The acting in this game is especially good and I'd like to single out David Hayter's Old Snake and the guy who played Otacon for praise because those were the two characters I ended up liking the most because of the great acting that characterized them. I am man enough to say that I almost shed a tear at the end. I was kind of touched by the acting and storytelling

I'd like to take a second to address some of the boss fights in this game I'd say that exactly half of them were freaking awesome and the other half were a letdown. I had high expectations entering this game after watching the awesome trailer with the beauty and the beast unit (you can see it at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CdfPp4xVqa0 seriously watch the trailer it's pure awesomeness squeezed into 4 minutes and 21 seconds) and after hearing stories of past metal gear bosses like Psycho Mantis or The End (I heard the stories from people before I even knew what the game was about oddly enough). I have to say that in comparison to No More Heroes (a game with bosses that I thought were inspired by the Metal Gear series) some of MGS4's bosses are a little disappointing. But I will say this the fight with Screaming Mantis is worthy of being added to the pantheon of great metal gear bosses (Possible spoiler: Please do not look up how to beat her you can figure it out easily enough because one of the methods of stopping her is established in a previous boss fight, well kind of. My point is you should be able to figure out the trick to this boss fight after enough trial and error. Looking up what to do would take away at least half the fun of this fight in my opinion). Also while there are some issues with the final boss fight I think the way it's presented is just too cool to give it any fault. Also I'd like to mention that the game does come to a really satisfying conclusion and I can't really see any continutation of solid snake's story after this (Maybe a new protagonist will be introduced in the inevitable sequel, or the next game will be another flashback like MGS3). There are also some really cool set pieces that I would hate to spoil in this review. I really liked the ones in act 2 and 3.

Overall I would say that MGS4 is a great and worthy game to serve as a showcase for everything the PS3 can do from the beautifully rendered, and superbly acted cutscenes to the great attention to detail, and awe inspiring battles. Even if you are a newbie to the series (like I was) you can still enjoy this excellent game. Just watch that trailer with the beauty and the beast unit that I linked to earlier that shit freaked me out the first time I saw it and then watch the first four parts of the retrospective on Gametrailers you'll be prepared enough.

(Also since this game is like Sony's knight in shining armor and all, did anyone find it odd that Otacon and Sunny were using apple computers? I mean macs are great and all but wouldn't you think Sony would want them to use the Sony branded Vaios? I mean James Bond was using Sony branded products every chance he could get in Casino Royale which was also produced by Sony. Just an observation on my part I would really like to discuss it with people I mean I watched the featurettes on the extra disc included in the MGS4 collector's edition and I could plainly see that Kojima likes apple stuff but...) And I didn't make that picture up there, but it's freaking hilarious!!

Also this game automatically gets a thumbs up from me because the ending song refrences Sacco and Vanzetti. Yeah that's right. Mother fucking Sacco and Vanzetti the anarchists who were executed by the U.S. Government for being anarchists. That's like a million cool points for the game right there.

Here's to you Nicola and Bart
Rest forever here in our hearts
The last and final moment is yours
That agony is your triumph

Not anime

2007-04-07T20:02:00.000-05:00

So I'm one of the lucky few people who has a wii, literally figuratively, metaphorically and metaphysically, and I'm one of the even fewer people that has a wii and an Xbox 360. Here are my thoughts on each. You might be asking yourself, "Why is this article not about anime?" to which I would reply, "It is you just aren't looking deep enough. Open your mind grasshopper".

Wii-(teeheeeheee)
THis thing is excellent and what few games I have for it are awesome, especially zelda twilight princess. The only two problems with the wii are that the graphics aren't as detailed or polished as the other next gen consoles (which isn't that bad to me gameplay and story are all that matters), and that there aren't many good games (zelda, and coming soon paper Mario are the only two great games [FUCK YOU WII SPORTS AND WARIO WARE!!!!!]). But let me tell you something this console is freaking durable I accidentally kicked this thing off the stand where I keep it, and my wii crashed to the ground, while I was still playing a game. Naturally I was horrified, but guess what the game was still playing, and the wii still worked great.

My opinion wait for some good games and get this.

XBox 360

This console is awesome, and the games are great. Dead Rising and Oblivion are the standouts here (FUCK YOU GEARS OF WAR!!!!). I bought mine on December 24 2006, and the console worked great until today. I popped in Dead rising, and two minutes after I started the game it froze. Naturally I thought this was a one time occurence, and immediately restarted the system, and tried again. Guess what it froze again, and again and again and again....etc...etc...etc. I called customer support, and they were really great and helpful, and they even gave me instructions that allowed my xbox to function for about 15 minutes, but then the xbox crapped out again and I gave up for good. Now I have to send it in to get repairs (for free I might add).

My conclusion the xbox is awesome, but be afraid becasue it may freeze out on you. Thankfully customer support is pretty good.

Venture Bros. Season One DVD Review

2006-10-13T18:31:00.000-05:00

Alright you guys know how much I love the venture Bros. so I'm writting a review of the first season. The DVD sales have been excellent, and this set even reached #1 on Amazon's best seller list. Everyone needs to go out and buy this set, It is awesome!!

Disc One
Dia De los Dangerous-3.4* this was a pretty good episode, but the animation was a little crude, and there was some unnecessary exposition. The whole monarch origin sequence was kind of awkardly initiated, but the writers have done a better job with the recent origin sequences (Phantom limb has like 3 origins, and none of them are verified). But the opening sequence of this show is so awesome, and it touces on some of my favorite urban legends, chupacabra and stolen kidneys (Awesome).

Careers in Science-3.5* I thought this episode was aweful the first time I watched it, but when I watched it again I thought it was alot better. Watch out for PHANTOM SPACEMAN!!!

Mid-ife Chrysalis-1.5* This episode just sucks, the main plot involves Doc. Venture being turned into a giant caterpillar, ala metamorphosis, and there just aren't many jokes or entertaining moments. Oh well.

Eeny, Meeny, Miney...Magic-3.3* This episode features the debut of Doctor Orpheus, and is a pretty good episode. Not alot of action, but this episode deserves an extra half point for the Marco Polo scene.

The Incredible Mr. Brisby-3.2* Really good episode with a parody of Walt Disney who forcibly enlists Doc. Venture to create a clone of himself...Foreshadowing? Otherwise this was a pretty neat episode and also features the debut of Molotov Cocktease...best name ever!

Tag Sale You're it!-4.5* Awesome episode, everything is funny from the opening scene ("If I had it my way you'd all be in skirts") to the final credits. This episode also initiates the infamous Anne Frank vs. Lizzie Borden debate (Anne Frank would win of course "She's scrappy")

Home Insecurity-3* I don't really like this episode, but it has the most epic opening sequence, and has the best asassination attempt on Doc. Venture ever. I didn't care for the six million dollar man parody or the Big foot appearance though.

Ghosts of the Sargasso-3.8* A pretty good episode that lampoons all those old Scooby Doo stereotype villains. Also I like the parody of Captain America parody with the Action Man.

Disc Two

Ice Station--Impossible!-3* A pretty lackluster episode that really shouldn't be that bad. Stephen Colbert voices a character, and it even has a parody of the Fantastic four, but I just didn't enjoy it that much. Race Bannon from Johnny Quest has a Cameo also.

Are You There, God? Its Me Dean.-4.2* No man can watch this and not be afraid, it introduces two of the most horrible genitalia related ailements known to man. One is the dreaded Candiru, and the other...Testicular Torsion (FREAKING SCARY! OH MY GOD I DID NOT NEED TO KNOW ABOUT THAT SHIT). Because of these horrible genital related ailements I was not able to enjoy the episode the first time I saw it, and the second time just freaked me out, but the third time was a charm and I loved it. THe show is hilarious, and it even has the sequel to the Anne Franke Lizzie Borden debate, in the form of whether smurfs are mammals or reptiles.

Past Tense-4.8* When an old college roommate of Doc Venture kidnaps him, Brock Baron Underbheit, and Pete White, It's up to Hank and Dean to reunite Team Venture and save their Doc. and Brock. A really well done episode, and very funny, the whole League of Extraordinary Gentleman parody is hilarious.

The Trial of the Monarch-4.8* I could never properly describe the awesomeness of this episode so I give you the greatest quote ever. "While you were busy castrating I priceless artifact, I have been busy feeding babies to hungry mutated puppies"

Return to Spiderskull Island-4.9* The only thing bringing this episode down is the odd opening sequence that was not properly explained. Apparently the writers had to cut a few scenes out of this episode, and the one that explains the entire opening sequence was cut. Oh well, still an awesome episode.

Bonus episodes

The terrible secret of Turtle Bay-3* has some great lines and has the best euphemism for sex ever "The Mommy and Daddy dance".

A Very Venture Christmas-5* YESSS Somebody else thinks the Krampaus is funny also

Extras
There are a few commentaries, but the creators get distracted talking about how they met, divulging secrets (that get bleeped out), and even talking about which characters they would have sex with female and male?!?!
Aside from the commentaries there are much better extras like the animating Hank and Dean Segment, and the Behind the Scenes of the Venture Bros. Live Action Movie Featurette. Then there's also deleted scenes, but those aren't that great.

Overall I say that you must go out and buy this DVD set, It's awesome.

A is for Anime, B is for Blasphemy, E is for EXTINCTION!!!!!

2006-09-30T22:59:00.000-05:00

Hey Vicious Dreamer and Aimless Anarchist, You are on notice. You guys have not done anything substantial for this blog within the past few months, and I'm pissed.
Rabbit-man is Pissed ya hear, and there's gonna be hell to pay. I've done about 99.9% of the work of this blog, and my name is still last on the contributors list?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
No way you guys are going down!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You guys want to redeem yourselves then write a review, or make a post, or even comment on something, alright?
YOuR's TrUly,
RABBIT-MAN!!!!
Special Bonus Feature, Quotes from the Venture Bros. I stole from a dvd review site:

"Fine, fine. But you have to understand—you can't waltz into the middle of a delicate, high-stakes chess tournament and yell 'King me!' just 'cause he bitched up your face. Venture and I have been engaged in a deadly game of cat and also cat for years…"

"Why is it every time I need to get somewhere, we get waylaid by jackassery?"

"I am known to men as Doctor Orpheus. And mine is to perceive and control the delicate arrangement of the cosmos."
"They give out Ph.D.s for that?"
"Junior college upstate. Communications major, minor in Women's Studies."

"While you were wasting your time castrating a priceless antique, I have been systematically feeding babies to hungry mutated puppies!"

"You could've told me Sasquatch was a…a dude."
"You couldn't tell?"
"Not until I had to…shave him."
"What are you, shy? Sasquatch doesn't have anything you haven't seen before."
"Sasquatch IS something I haven't seen before!!!!"

"Dean, have you been shooting dope into your scrotum? You can tell me—I'm hip!"

"Dean, Dean, Dean—you're supposed to be the smart one. You know your father would never turn Scamp inside out. I've simply removed all of his skin."

"I want a second opinion. Oh wait—I'M a doctor. I can give myself one! You suck, and I'm leaving."

"Li-Li?"
"Yes, my longtime companda. I won her from David Bowie in a trivia contest. This was 1980, '81 perhaps—years before the big trivia craze…but then, Bowie always was a trendsetter."

Harry Potter and the HEART OF DARKNESS!!!!!

2006-09-25T17:58:00.000-05:00

Apparently Batman was pulled over for drunk driving in Scotland, and police discovered his buddy Superman riding shotgun, also drunk. Now I know what you are thinking, but I'm not making this up, go check this website. All I have to say is that I am sorely disappointed, I mean it seems like all these "police" are doing lately is arresting blessed symbols of christianity for being associated with drinking and driving. I mean first Mel Gibson, now Superman!!! Who's next?

You know what? This is all Batman's fault, that jerk was just trouble from the beginning, and now look at what he's dragging superman into. YOU HEAR ME BATMAN, LEAVE SUPERMAN ALONE HE DOESN'T WANT ANY OF YOUR GIGGLE WATER, (well apparently he does, but alcoholism is a sickness, he can't help it, unlike you Batman! DO YOU BEHAVE THIS WAY WITH ROBIN? FOR GOD'S SAKE HE'S A MINOR YOU CAN'T BE GIVING HIM BEER!!!!)!!!!! So we should all seek to get superman some help, and check him into a rehab center. BUT WAIT, it's Scottland, they have no rehab centers there.

That's it, I say we all go out and find Batman and freaking kill him, he just perverted not only a blessed symbol of christianity, but also a symbol of Americana (he's a jewish symbol also). I for one won't let this stand, and I say we also lead an assault on Scotland soon. We'll make those god damned drunken Scots pay!!!!!!

DVD Review!!!

2006-09-22T21:49:00.000-05:00

Alright there folks I'm doing something a little different today, I'm reviewing a DVD, specificallyBatman Beyond: Return of the Joker, The original, uncut Version. This is a pretty crazy movie, and let me begin things off by saying how freaking hard it was to get a hold of this thing. Every Best Buy I went to had the edited version of this movie that's like seven minutes shorter. Just go to wikipedia and see all the edits made to this movie, it's hilarious. Lets begin things off with a review divided into 5 categories: Story, Characters, Picture, Extras, Replayability.

Story: I need to say one thing first: THIS MOVIE IS NOT FOR THE CHILDREN! It is freaking twisted, and the joker does some horrible stuff. However, my scientific tests have proven that if you are over 13 then you probably won't be too heavily traumatized, so go ahead and watch it. When the Batman Beyond series began, it really rejected convention, by giving the new Batman his own villains (not just updated versions of the originals), and by not really focusing on the how the old Batman grew to become a bitter old man. Needless to say some fans of the original Batman show were a little disappointed with this new one.Well Batman fans finally got their wish with this movie, which not only brings back batman's most famous enemy, but it also tells the original Batman's last battle with the Joker. Overall I thought that this movie was really well done, and it pretty much stays interesting from beginning to end, with no dull time. With a really great confrontation at the end providing a bittersweet ending to the movie.

Characters: I really liked the updated character designs for this movie, the older Bruce Wayne, the new Batman, and all of the joker's henchmen really looked cool. I should really make a comment on how they fixed the Joker's character design, in the Batman cartoon that preceded this, the joker looked horrible, but in the flashback scene for this movie, they made the joker alot cooler looking. The future version of the Joker is kind of plain, but one must consider that the writers were trying to make him alot darker, and more serious. To do this, they made him cut out some of the goofy aspects of his design, and focused on a more Hannibal Lecter type look for him.

Extras: This movie has the best extras of any animated Batman Movie, There is a great audio commentary, a bit of a fluff piece documentary advertising Batman Beyond, a music video, deleted scenes, and animatics. Of these the audio commentary is the most informative, and best overall extra. Everything else is pretty much standard, but I always enjoy hearing what the creator's thoughts on their movie.

Picture: This movie looks great, and this leads me to how this movie relates to anime, this movie was animated entirely in Japan. Also notable is the vibrant coloring in this movie, entirely computer generated.

Replayability: I'm not sure if replayability is a word, and if it isn't then I'm taking credit for it, and you JERKS AREN'T ALLOWED TO USE IT WITHOUT MY PERMISSION!!!! I would say that the complex nature of this movie would definetly warrant a second viewing.

So overall I highly recommend getting this movie, if you can find it.

Batman Mask of the Phantasm

2006-09-11T20:41:00.000-05:00

I'd like to spend a little bit of time talking about the best Batman movie made so far. No I'm not talking about Batman Begins, or the Tim Burton movies, but Batman Mask of the Phantasm. Phantasm was the first movie made by the brilliant animators who worked on the Batman cartoon that started up in the early 90s. That series was, and still is, my favorite interpretation of the Batman character, and I have recently rediscovered that amazing show. Let my review of this movie guide you into this first, and best foray into Batman's animated adventures. (Don't even get me started on the Crap that is the newest animated incarnation of Batman.)

First of all I must talk about the character designs for this movie, which were all based off of Bruce Timm's iconic art style. These designs are very unique, and as I said before iconic, many have hailed this series character designs, and animation for being very lush, and for providing alot of detail and movement. What I liked in particular about this movie was the use of shadows on Batman, and how characters would blend in and shroud themselves in them. In fact this movie is very dark with most of the scenes taking place at night. Overall all character designs are very nice, and attractive. This series has much more fluidity in it's animation, and it is refreshing to watch animation that was produced completely by hand, instead of today's mostly computer generated/aided animation.

The voice acting in this movie is incredible, I remember reading someplace about how the casting agent Andrea Romano looked for actors with character in their voices, and that this series' voice actors often recorded their lines together to allow for greater chemistry between actors. First off I have to mention Kevin Conroy, the voice of Batman, he provided an extra psychological layer to this movie by using two distinct voices when voicing Batman and Bruce Wayne. I should also mention that Conroy has been voicing Batman for the Past 14 years. (DAMN THAT NEW CARTOON FOR CASTING SOME OTHER JERK AS BATMAN!!!!! DAMN THEM!!!!!!) Dana Delany provides the voice for Bruce Wayne's love interest in this movie, and does an excellent job. I just have to say that I love just about every voice acting performance I have heard Delany in, she imbues any character she voices with instant respectability, and personality. Also Mark Hamil (yes Luke Skywalker) provides the most definitive take on the Joker ever, bar none, and his voice acting work is just incredible. In fact it is blasphemy that he isn't in that godforsaken new Batman cartoon either. The only voice actor that I didn't like was the guy who voiced the hot shot politician, I forget the politician's name and position, he just didn't have that "it" factor to his voice.

Lastly the plot to this movie was very good, in the beginning I was just a little bored, with the flow of the story, but after about fifteen minutes I was completely hooked, and the ending more than made up for the slowness of the first fifteen minutes. I don't want to spoil much of the plot for you guys, so I'll just mention what other far more respectable, and renown critics have said about this movie. Ebert and Roeber gave this movie two thumbs up, the first Batman movie to recieve such an honor (and the only one up until Batman Begins came and tore down the house). Steve Parshall said it best when he hailed this version of Batman as, "Gotham City's savior the way he was meant to be". Some of my favorite scenes in this movie revolve around Bruce Wayne debating his vow to his parents, because he has found true love, and wants to settle down, but of course this is Batman, and well lets just say that things don't end happily for him. I just can't recommend this movie enough.

So I guess I should give this a numerical grade...Hmm I'll go with a 98.

I Know this says comic book adaptation, but dammit it looks cool

Why Naruto is ruining the Children

2006-09-03T00:13:00.000-05:00

Now you guys may be wondering, "What the hell has happened to Anime is Blasphemy? All they do is post videos off of youtube, and talk about the Venture Bros. I hate it, even though Venture Bros is freaking awesome, however, I wish they would talk about Anime." I am here to say that I, Rabbit-man will talk about anime today, so all you jerks can just SHUT UP!!!!

Now where was I, oh yeah, Naruto apparently is gathering up a truckload of ratings for the Cartoon Network, and those crazed young boys between the ages of 2 and 12, just can't get enough of that plucky little ninja. In fact many people are saying that Naruto will become the next Dragon Ball Z in that all boys in their tweens and early teenage years will be watching it. Now I could include some ratings information, to back up my claims about Naruto's popularity, but that would take time, and I don't have it, because I'm mad as hell, and I need to say some stuff. Mainly that NARUTO IS RUINING THE CHILDREN!!!!!
Don't believe me do you, well here are five reasons why:

1. It encourages cheating on tests- I remember watching this one episode where all the main characters had to cheat on this Test in order to become full fledged Ninjas, and about half of the episode was about them cheating in all sorts of cool ways. Just what is this telling the children? I'll tell you what, that those little freaks can cheat on their tests, because their heroes the ninjas did it. NO NO NOOO!!!!

2. It is sexist-Whenever I watch this show that chick with the pink hair never does anything. Naruto and his little buddy Sasuke could be getting their asses kicked by that goddamn transexual kid with the ice mirrors, and the pink haired chick just cries while they are getting owned. Not to mention that one time when the pink haired chick was supposed to defend her friends from three incredibly gay ninjas, and she got whupped, and had to have like nine other dudes save her. Then there was that episode where that same pink haired chick fought the blonde bimbo chick, and they reminisced about how they learned to arrange flowers in Ninja school. What the hell So according to Naruto all women are good for is crying when their friends are getting their asses kicked, getting saved by other people, and arranging flowers. LAME

3. The main character is a misfit loser-Yeah I'll say it, this whole trend started with those gosh darned Harry Potter books, with their messages like "You can be whatever you want to be, and try hard". NO you stupid kids, you'll never be like Harry Potter, because Harry Potter is freaking wizard, and wizards don't exist, but frog wizards do (and don't you people debate me on that again). So by that same logic the children can't be like Naruto because he's a Ninja and Ninjas don't exist, and never did. AND DON'T YOU PEOPLE TELL ME THEY DID!!!

4. The main character is possessed by a Demon, and nobody cares-Back in my day whenever somebody got possessed by a demon, people either made a movie about it, tried to exorcise it, or they at least talked to a televangelist about it. But nowadays, they think Oh I'll use the demon's power to beat up that goddamned transexual kid with the ice mirrors, and that albino with the snake tongue. Well let me tell you what. Using a Demon's powers to beat up people no matter how annoying they are is bad, because DEMONS ARE AGENTS OF THE DEVIL!!!!

5. They fight with weapons- Now I'll be the first to admit throwing a Ninja star at somebody is pretty cool, but I'm a teenage boy who would never do such a thing, unless if I was paid to do so, or it was in an act of Vengeance. But I digress, all the kids who watch this show will soon take their kitchen butcher knives, and begin to recreate their favorite Ninja battles, which is completely wrong, because ninjas don't use knives to kill, they use their special ninja techniques. You don't want the children to kill each other with weapons in the name of Naruto, because it's inacurate to the spirit of the show. Besides killing someone with a weapon is just cowardly, a true ninja would kill somebody with their bare hands, while they're naked, just like Brock Samson. WATCH THE VENTURE BROTHERS!!!!!

Heavy Metal Band Summons a Giant Finnish Troll Revisited

2006-08-30T20:33:00.000-05:00

Some of my readers have had some trouble understanding the music in this clip, so as a service to you the people, I Rabbit-man present: Rabbit-man's translation to an indecipherable heavy metal song.
Musta
Krakish
Musta
Krakish
Musta
Krakish
Musta
Krakish
Awaken
Awaken
Awaken
Awaken
Take the land where it must be taken
Awaken
Awaken
Awaken
Awaken
Devour worlds and spite forsaken
Rise up from your thousand year old sleep
Bring forth from your great terror beneath
I command you to
Rise
Rise
Rise
Rise
Rise
Rise
Rise
Rise
And awaken

Bunny boy corrected:

2006-08-29T20:14:00.000-05:00

Good day, readers of this pathetic excuse of a blog. The humble Vicious Dreamer at your service. It has been while since I posted something, so be glad. Now recently, it has come to my attention that a certain idiot, by the name of Rabbit-boy, decided to post his thought of how the cast of Batman should be. Apparently, he forgot the fact that Heath F-ing Ledger is playing what is supposed to be the ultimate villain of Batman, making it totally gay. Since I'm a nice guy, I'll correct that pulp brained furry bastard and post a more realistic version of the up coming Batman movie. If you have objections, I'll just spite you because that means you are a complete moron. NO ONE objects me! NO ONE! Mwahahahahaha!!!!

Harlequinade

2006-08-22T21:36:00.000-05:00

I hear that Joker's gonna be the villain for the next Batman movie. I can only hope that they put my favorite Batman villain Harley Quinn, the Joker's female foil, into the movie.
I'll even help to cast her, how about Jessica Alba. She's got the right body type, and she can act well enough. Besides it's not like they would give her many lines, because the next movie will be Joker-centric. I just think it would be cool to see her in the new movie.

She's the one in red for all you idiots out there, the other guy is the Joker.

The Amazing Screw-on Head

2006-08-15T22:01:00.000-05:00

Watch it!!!!!!! Scifi.com!!!! NOW!!!!!

More Venture Bros. goodness

2006-08-09T22:58:00.000-05:00

This one has the best background music ever.

Freaking hilarious

This happens to me all the time.

2006-08-05T18:54:00.000-05:00

Name That Quote Part 2

2006-07-16T23:56:00.000-05:00

Name the T.V. show in which these lines are said:

Person 1: Here is where you are wrong, my friend. This woman has killed before.
Person 2: Allegedly.
Person 1: Okay, whatever. But she was a big girl. We are talking about a large, healthy woman of questionable stability.
Person2: Oh, you are totally underestimating the never-say-die scrappiness of a survivor.
Person 3: Hey, guess what? Nobody cares who would win in a crazy fantasy fist-fight between Anne Frank and Lizzie Borden.

Person 1: Come on! They have one female servicing a large group of males. That implies a species that lays eggs.
Person2: Oh my God, you're crazy! They're so obviously mammals!
Person 1: Please! She'd be in estrus 24/7 if she didn't lay eggs.
Person 2: Smurfs don't lay eggs! I won't tell you this again! Papa Smurf has a f***ing beard! They're mammals!

Person 1: [my brother] and I just woke up on the floor. We were playing Ouija and a guy hypnotized us.
Person 2: [Son]?
Person 1: With his magical Dracula powers.
Person 2: [Son] I'm going to turn around now and you'd better be on fire. You're standing there in flames and the only person who can put you out is me! Because that is the only conceivable reason that you would wake me up like this!

Person 1: What powers this device?
Person 2: Oh, you know, the usual stuff.
Person 1: "Person 2"...
Person 2: Well, ok, there might have been ONE foreign part.
Person 1: Such as?
Person 2: A, um... [mutters]
Person 1: What was that?
Person 2: A, uh... orphan
Person 1: Did you say... an ORPHAN? This monstrosity is powered by a forsaken child?
Person 2: Well, not ALL of it! I didn't use the whole thing!

Top 5 Worst Anime Endings

2006-07-03T16:32:00.001-05:00

Alright I was watching the ending of Cowboy Bebop the other day and thought "Man they hardly wrapped up anything. It seems like the Japanese just can't come up with a good ending for their shows." Maybe it was because of that thought, or because it was about 2:00 in the morning, but all of a sudden I was inspired to write a list of the worst anime endings I had seen. Eventually I got about seven, and I realized that I must have ten, so I tried to think up three more, and eventually I gave up, so I decided to just have 5. So I proudly present the top 5 worst anime endings.
(Warning this has spoilers)

ESCAFLOWNE- Man if there is one ending I hate, it is one that is rushed, and completly misses the point of the whole series, and guess what Escaflowne has both of those. Now I realize that this is probably blasphemy to many of you anime lovers, but I'm going to come out and say it. Escaflowne does not merit the high praise you people give it. The main character was annoying, the auxilary characters were largely ignored, the villains were ludicrous (The main one was freaking Isaac Newton, and another one turned out to be one of the main character's sisters, but she was a DUDE. WTF!!!!!), and the music was not that great. The ending just completely ignored the little love story that was the backbone of the series, and basically restored things to the status quo, making most of the happenings in the story pointless.

COWBOY BEBOP- Sure it had a great fight scene, but the finale left the viewer hanging, and was not a satisfying conclusion to the series. The final scene is basically the main character collapsing, leaving the viewer wondering whether he was alive or dead, and some plot points were left unanswered. I can respect an ending that is purposely vague to set up a planned movie or something, but this is ridiculous, and as of this writing there is no sequel or movie being planned for Bebop.

Wolf's Rain- Now I didn't really like this series, but I always had a little interest in finding out if the wolves would make it to paradise, and, much like escaflowne, the ending basically forgot the entire point of the show and reverted everything to the status quo, which basically made the series pointless. I mean they could have at least killed off all the main characters, or had the world end, but no this anime decided to have everything go back to status quo, by replaying the beginning of the series. Darn lazy writting.

BIG O- I am including the entire first and second season in this. The first ending to Big O was bad, but the second was worse. Basically it was like Wolf's Rain in that the ending was a replay of the first scene of the series, implying that time was reversed, making the whole series pointless. The reason why Big O is behind Wolf's Rain is that the story is unfinished, and this is not the ending the creators had intended for it. Apparently a third season was planned to wrap up the story of Roger Smith, and the ending of the Second season would lead to the third, meaning that the events of the series may not have been in vain. However we will never know because Big O has been canceled again.

RAHXEPHON-Man I can't really tell you what happened here, but it looked alot like two giant robots having sex. I had watched this series under the assumption that it was better than evangelion, but the only thing it was better at was having a weirder ending. The whole series was just weird, and I think the creators must have eaten some of the brownies that were being served to the writers of Bobobo-bo bo-bobo prior to writing the ending, because the Rahxephon finale made absolutely no sense whatsoever.

RABBIT-MAN RETURNS

2006-06-28T15:22:00.000-05:00

What crazed delusional anime character said this?

"Even without the events of 40 years ago, I think man would still be a creature that fears the dark. He doesn't face that fear, he averts his eyes from it and acts as if he doesn't have any memories of his past. But, 40 years is both a short time and yet, a long time. Man's fear has withered. And even time itself tries to wither the desire to know the truth. Is it a crime to try and learn the truth? Is it a sin to search for those things which you fear. My purpose in this world is knowledge, and the dissemination of it. And it is I who is to restore the fruits of my labor to the entire world. Fear... It is something vital to us puny creatures. The instant man stop fearing is the instant the species reaches a dead end, only to sink to pitable lows, only to sit and wait apathetically for extinction. Humans who lose the ability to think become creatures whose existance has no value. Wake up! Don't be afraid of knowledge! Think, you humans who are split into two worlds, unless you want the gulf between humans to expand into oblivion, you must think!"

Bobobo-bo bo-bobo (This is not a review)

2006-04-26T23:47:00.000-05:00

In these dark times of terrorism, and political unrest, Bo-bobo, like Don Quixote before him, harkens us back to a forgotten age, an age of chivalry.

The year is 300x, as the evil hair hunt troop casts a shadow of fear and despair over the land, only one warrior can stand in their way. He is Bo-bobo, a gifted warrior trained in the ancient techniques of the nose hair, his courage shines out like a ray of hope to the oppressed people he valiantly fights to protect.

One of the first things I must say about bo-bobo is that it is an acquired taste. Upon first viewing many people will write it off as another silly anime, but those that stick around will discover another layer to this amazing show. The adventures of Bo-bobo and his friends can be interpreted as an allegory for the struggles of the average man. Every day people find themselves living in a constant state of monotony, and for them the adventures of Bo-bobo shine out like a beacon, a promise for a more interesting, and enlightening existence.

Still think Bo-bobo is a silly cartoon well here is a condensed literary analysis to some of the characters. Bobobo himself is a perfect example of the archetypical hero, one who will protect his ideals and beliefs at all costs. Beauty is presented as a normal person, who is hurtled from a life of mediocrity into a fantastic life of wonder and awe, the Dante to Bobobo's Virgil. Finally Don Patch often provides the impossible solution to the impossible problem, a literary phenomenon known as deus ex machina.

Keep these ideas in mind when you watch the next episode, and you too may reach enlightenment, like me.

Gundam Seed

2006-04-17T19:22:00.000-05:00

Okay first off a question have you seen any of the following shows: Mobile suit Gundam, Mobile suit Gundam wing, or Mobile Suit Gundam 0080: War in the Pocket, you probably have a really really good idea of what to expect of this series. Basically it is about some kids who pilot giant fighting robots, and fight alot while philosophizing about how bad war is....while fighting in one...VOLUNTARILY.....wait did I describe Gundam Seed, or JUST ABOUT EVERY SINGLE GUNDAM SHOW.

So how does the successful (at least in Japan) Gundam formula work this time?

Visual Quality-17 points. Overall this is a pretty well animated series, and features some great animation. Considering the fact that it had a whole bunch of money put up behind it, and was made in 2002, it had better have some top quality stuff. The show features lots of vivid bright colors, and fluid animation, THAT IS NOT THE PROBLEM WITH THIS SHOW. The problem with this show is that the character designer completely sucks. Perhaps I should explain myself, the man's name is Hisaishi Hirai, and he runs by the pseudonym "He that can only draw three faces". If you don't believe me then watch S-cry-ed, Fafner, or infinite ryvius and see if you don't recognize a few characters (I haven't seen Fafner or Infinite Ryvius, but I can only guess that they are the same).

Plot-28 points. Oh yes, when I said everything in this show is a copy of previous Gundam shows before it, I was not excluding the plot. The story reads like a checklist from any Gundam show before it,

Blonde haired villain in a white mask
Young kids with genetic abilities
Said young kids stealing Gundams from the "enemy"
Death of the main character's girlfriend
Main character is an orphan
Race wars
Death of "cool" character
Equal representation of both sides of conflict

Those above mentioned bullets are just a handful of the obvious shortcuts that this show has taken in plot. Oh wait I'm sorry, according to wikipedia Gundum seed is a "reimagining of the original Gundam show", oh okay Geez then every single Gundam show after it must be a reimagining also then? These things could be forgiven if the show was actually entertaining, but I personally had problems staying awake during this show, and this doesn't happen very often with me and animes. In conclusion this show is really boring, and copies the plots of other Gundam shows before it BAAAAADDDDDD!!!!!!

Characters-22 points. The only reason I could remeber any of the characters names was that the main characters kept yelling out each others names a couple times every episode, which I guess is this show's form of character development. So I guess I was a little harsh with that character development crack, they have some fairly good development in this show, and you end up knowing something about each of the characters, even if you don't know their names. Also all the characters are transplanted from other Gundam shows into this one. Want an example:

Is that Char Aznable? No its Sechs Merquise? No it's Rau le creset!!

Confused yet? I sure was.

Music-10 points. The music in this show was pretty good, the theme song was alright. Frankly this show needs the extra points for the music, I think I'll leave it at that.

Visual Quality-17 points, Plot-28 points, Characters-22 points, Music-10 points.

Overall score- 77 points

Lupin III: Castle of Cagliostro

2006-04-15T19:24:00.000-05:00

Lupin III is one of the biggest anime properties in Japan, with several long-running series and many many movies. However, only a few of those movies are even worth watching, and Castle of Cagliostro is the best of all of them. This film has many fans, and probably one of the most famous of them all is Steven Spielberg, who heralded this movie as one of the greatest adventure movies of all time. Another thing this movie has going for it is that it was directed by Hayao Miyazaki, the famous Japanese animator.

So how does one of Miyazaki's first movies rate?

Visual Quality-15 points. Having been made in the 70s most of the animation is not as great as the newer computer assisted movies, but everything still looks pretty good, and the characters are well animated. Since this movie is a part of a franchise not many points can be awarded for new character design, but the villians and new characters all seem to be pretty original.

Plot-38 points. This movie comes up with a completely original story that stands on its own when not viewed in the context of the T.V. series, and the storyline is pretty good also. Basically it revolves around a thief, Lupin III, who ends up trying to stop a notorious counterfeiter, and finds time to save a princess. I know it sounds kind of hokey, but give it a chance, it's worth it. The ending is fully resolved, and the movie is not too long, two things that often plague other Miyazaki movies. The only place that it loses points in is that some people will need to have a little bit of background info on the characters in order to understand some of the character relationships.
Characters- 29 points. This is probably the best any Lupin III related show is going to get, and as a result Lupin III, and his friends are at their best in this movie. The character development largely focuses on the newly introduced characters, and spends some time on the gang from the T.V. show. The lines in this movie are all great, seriously some of the best stuff I've heard in anime, Manga Entertainment, the English translators for this movie have done a great job, just thought I should mention that.

Music- 8 points. Some of the music in this movie is a little dated, but its still all good.

Visual Quality-15 points, Plot-38 points, Characters- 29 points, Music- 8 points

Overall score 90 points.

The Place Promised in our Early Days

2006-04-07T19:50:00.000-05:00

The place Promised in Our Early days is the second movie from a relatively new Director, Makoto Shinkai. Shinkai gained alot of buzz after he released Voices of A Distant Star, a movie that he wrote, voice acted, directed, and animated by himself on his computer. For his second movie Shinkai had to recruit a few more people, but still maintained the independent spirit of his first film. Both of his movies have recieved tremendous praise from the anime community, and some have dubbed Makoto Shinkai with the moniker of "the next Miyazaki".

High praise, but does Shinkai live up to it? Commence Reviewing NOW!!!

Visual Quality-20 points. The whole time I was watching this movie, I was in awe, it looks amazing, and it was not animated by major studio. It was mainly made by one man, and a few other people all on their computers. One thing that will strike any viewer is the incredible backgrounds, and the brethtaking sky scenery. The character designs are pretty well done, each character is distinct, and easily identifiable. Moreover the animation is fluid, and well done, I can't believe this wasn't produced by a major studio. I wonder what would happen if this guy was put in charge of a studio Ghibli movie, the beauty of it would probably kill whoever watched it.

Plot-35 points. Some of the subplots are a little weird, alot of Scifi stuff is included parallel dimensions and whatnot. The parts explaining all of the strange happenings went right over my head, I didn't even try to comprehend it (not that it was based on fact or anything). However, the main storyline of how friendship and romance develop over time is pretty good. Basically The place promised in our early days takes place in an alternate reality in which part of Japan is split into a northern and southern half after World War II and takes a look at the lives of three kids who build a plane to travel to a mysterious tower erected on the northern half of Japan. The ending of this anime leaves alot up to the viewers imagination, not exactly a bad thing, but I felt like I should mention it here.

Characters-27 points. One of the best parts of this movie is the extensive attention paid to developing the main characters. One of the main characters provides the narration for most of the tale. This technique of character development is seldom used in anime, and gives a unique tone to this film. Overall each of the three main characters comes off as a believable person, and this adds greatly to the impact of this anime.

Music-10 points. Lately I have been neglecting the music section of my reviews, so I will try to put a little more emphasis on this section. Overall the music is great, lots of orchestrated pieces, and songs. The music adds greatly to the romantic tone of this film.

Visual Quality-20 points, Plot-35 points, Characters-27 points, Music-10 points.

Overall score-92

If you guys didn't notice I, Rabbit-man, used a different style of writing for this review, tell me how you liked it.

End of Evangelion

2006-04-03T19:49:00.000-05:00

Damn, you guys complain a lot. Well, here’s my first review on Anime is Blasphemy and I present to you the masterpiece classic End of Evangelion.

For the people who have seen the post-modern, yet disappointing finale to the acclaimed Neon Genesis Evangelion Series, this movie was made for you!!!

When Neon Genesis Evangelion crew had their budget cut, they failed to produce what they had in mind. When Hideki Anno received the opportunity to finish the series as it was supposed to, he gave the public a masterpiece and an ultimate dis to those who had criticized him for the poor last two episodes. With the Evangelion series officially over, it won a place not only in the minds of millions of fanatics but also as an Anime Classic in a league of its own.

So onwards!

Visual quality: 20 points - The post modern art meets anime! From the mind of the acclaimed director Hideki Anno, the visual mastery of the production is perfect! The juxtaposition between the Live scenes and the anime frames is both subtle and symbolic. The battle scene of Asuka's last stand against the mass produced Evas is unchallenged as the best battle scene in the entire series. Every frame of the armageddon sequence is a piece of art. Heavily drunk(?) in mythological and bibilical allusions the astounding visual quality is one that deserves a place in the Louvre. Full points!

Plot: 34 points - Here is where End of Evangelion loses a few points. The concept of the Third Impact and the human complimentary project is a little vague and difficult to grasp, but it isn't to a point where it hinders you from enjoing the movie. In fact, it is a perfect finale to the series. Its surreal armageddon sequence makes us wonder about our own fleeting existence as we all have to come into terms with the inevitable demise of our own selves.

Character: 30 points - This is one of the few movies I have seen where there are no irrelevant characters. Each and everyone compliments each other. The protagonists are even more refined as we go into the depth of their souls, searching for their fears and desires. The level of philosophy presented within the anime is unbelievable. Through the actions of the characters nihilist and fatalist ideals are presented with humanism and free will. Unbelievable piece of work.

Music: 10 points - The music in End of Evangelion is brilliant. Especially the song juxtaposing the Third Impact, Come Sweet Death, exmplified the complex emotions of the human heart in ways that art and plot cannot. The music is mostly sad, morbid, or forboding as expected in a end of the world scenario, but the best qualities of every song was complimented to enhance its effects on the whole story. It's truly a masterpiece

Overall score - visual quality 20 points, Plot 34 points, Characters 30 points, Music 10 points

Total: 94 points!!!

Reality is in an unfamiliar place, and dreams are within reality.

And the truth is within your heart.

For it is the hearts of people that create their appearance

And new images will change peoples' hearts and appearances.

Images... the power of imagination... The power to create your own future, and to make time flow.

But people must act of their own free will, or nothing will change at all.

So you must find your lost self on your own...

Even if you lose your own words, or become lost in others' words.

Anyone can return to human form as long as they can imagine themselves in their own heart.

Don't worry. All living things have the ability to return to their original form... and the heart to go on living.

Anywhere can be heaven as long as you have the will to live.

After all, you're alive... and you can find the chance to achieve happiness anywhere.

My Neighbor Totoro

2006-04-01T21:51:00.000-05:00

Alright I know what you people are thinking, "Rabbit-man Totoro is a freaking children's movie, first you watch a girl movie and then this?!?!?!? what is the matter with you?" However the more important question really is "Rabbit-man you are British why didn't you spell neighbor, neigbour like you british people do?" Well there's no good reason, so get in the kitchen and make me supper fool. Now for some funny trivia about this movie, firstly Totoro was shown in tandem with a similarly happy little movie called grave of the fireflies, about two children happily living through the horrors of World War II (that ladies and Gentleman is sarcasm). No wonder it did so bad in the Japanese box office. In fact according to wikipedia this movie wasn't even profitable until they unleashed the Totoro plush dolls on the world. Those crazy kids love those things I mean look at this picture right here wouldn't you want one of these things. Think of all the hours you can spend disecting it.

With those important questions answered let's go on to the review NOOOWWWW!!!!!

Visual Quality-20 points. Amazingly this movie looks better than kiki's delivery service, a movie that was made a year after this one. The backgrounds are beautiful, and the character designs are awesome. There is a cat that is also a bus in this, did you hear that, a cat that is a freaking bus. NO I don't think you understand it is a cat, and it's insides look like a bus with little seats and everything, HOLY SHIT, I need one of those.

Plot-33 points. There is no plot in this movie, so it is kind of hard to grade this section, since most of the story is driven by the characters. The movie basically revolves around two sisters whose mom is hospitalized with an unknown disease, and their adventures with the totoro, forest spirits, they befriend. This movie, like kiki's delivery service is just a simple look at life with a mix of the fantastic thrown in.

Characters-29 points. This movie excels in this area, there are times when you wonder how they can make these characters so believeable. This movie can do no wrong in the character category, since it devotes so much time to character development. I only had a minor problem with the fact that the catbus, and the Totoro were not in there more. That catbus was so awesome.

Music-9 points. Some times the music seemed a little outdated, and some of it was pretty childish, which makes sense since this is a family movie. All the rest of the music was awesome though.

Visual Quality-20 points, Plot-33 points, Characters-29 points, Music-9 points.

Overall score-91 points

Kiki's Delivery service

2006-03-25T23:51:00.000-05:00

I know what all you people are thinking, "Rabbit-man Kiki's delivery service is a movie for girls, why the heck did you watch it?", Well uhh lets see the answer is that....the movie was made by Hayao Miyazaki, and I was expecting all sorts of blood and violence, and all that other stuff that real men like me like. YEAH I think I'm gonna go kill some stuff right now, give me a second....

Visual Quality-20 points. If any of you people haven't figured it out already, I, Rabbit-man really like the movies animated by studio Ghibli, and directed by Hayao Miyazaki. For me to give this movie anything less than 20 points would be blasphemy....wait this blog is called anime is blasphemy....shit.....Well anyway the character designs are pretty cool, and the animation is very fluid. I was really surprised with how good this movie looks, it was made in 1989, seriously look at some American stuff from that time, most of it is crap in comparison to this.

Plot-34 points. This is a pretty simple movie, the story revolves around a young witch living in an unfamiliar place, while trying to mature into an adulthood. Unlike many of Miyazaki's other more epic movies, this one consists of many "episodic" scenes, there is no bad guy (not that there are well defined bad guys in any of Miyazaki's movies, except for that lupin the III one), or an overarching plot. This can be a good thing, because many of those epic movies miyazaki tend to be hastily/badly resolved, see Howl's moving castle, but this one has a nice satisfying ending. That gets this movie some bonus points in my book.

Characters-29 points. All of the characters are well developed here. The movie mainly focuses on Kiki and her cat, but the supporting characters are sufficiently represented here. Miyazaki is an admitted feminist, and it is fairly obvious in this movie. There are only 3 main male characters, and only one has more than a few lines.

Music- 10 points. This movie has some pretty good music, but I have heard better in the other Ghibli movies. I liked many of the italian sounding pieces in this though.

Visual Quality-20 points, Plot-34 points, Characters-29 points, Music- 10 points

Overall score- 93 points

Howl's Moving Castle

2006-03-12T20:49:00.000-05:00

Alright, I have wanted to see this movie ever since it was first released theatrically in English. In fact my quest to see Howl's was one of anguish and torment. I show up at the god*** theater and what does the clerk say, "No this is a special screening, you have to have a pass to see this." What the hell, I was never told of this pass. So I say to the clerk, "Listen theater-slave, this is America, a free country, if I want to see this movie I can!!" To which the clerk replies, "You f***ng idiot, this is England". So I left dejected, and suicidal, and had to wait for the DVD release.
So after a couple of months the DVD came out, and I watched it, and all I have to say is WOW.

Hayao Miyazaki, the master animator has returned to film-making, after another brief retirement, to direct what may be his final production, and he pulls no punches in this installment. So how did it do, huh, huh, HUH!!!???

Visual Quality- 23 points. Now I know what you all are thinking, "HEY RABBIT-MAN VISUAL QUALITY IS ONLY WORTH 20 POINTS, AND YOU GAVE THIS 23. WHAT'S UP WITH THAT?" TO WHICH I WOULD REPLY "SHUT THE HELL UP, I'M IN CHARGE OF THIS NOW LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!" So if anyone has read vicious dreamer's review (it's right below this one go ahead, after you read this), you saw that extra points can be given, if the reviewer says so, TYRANNY DAMNIT TYRANNY. This movie looks awesome, everything moves so smoothly, and the castle looks amazing. This, quite possibly , could be Hayao Miyazaki's last film, and Studio Ghibli wanted to pull out all the stops for his swansong. The character designs are awesome as usual, and the main female character, Sophie, happens to look different from the classic Miyazaki female character (which is a good thing, creativity, nothing wrong with the original character designs).

Plot-28 points. This is where the whole movie falls apart. I was digging the beginning, and as the time began to pass by, I wondered, how the hell are they gonna finish this. Well shortly after I thought this all hell broke loose, and every plot point was solved, IN LIKE 3 SECONDS. What the hell? The ending is pretty much the only flaw in this movie, because it was freaking rushed, and it just didn't make sense. Also some relationships could be explored, possibly to explain the sudden romance that popped out of nowhere.

Characters- 28 points. I have no faults at all with the characters in this movie. They are all pretty cool, and developed about as well as they can be in a movie, DAMN TIME CONSTRAINTS. Wow I am really using some foul language, all right from here on in no more. So why did I take off that one point...Oh yeah, that scarecrow guy, I just didn't like him, it would be a spoiler if I said why though.

Music-9 points. Yeah I liked the music, it was pretty cool, I don't have much else to say about it.

Overall score-88

So I have graded this better than Mononoke, before you all attack me remember, that the gorgeous visuals are what gave Howl's such a good grade.

Edit: I changed the grade on this movie, it wasn't sitting well with me, it was a 92, and I think I misadded originally. I HATE YOU BASIC MATH!!!!

Edit: The mononoke grade has been increased, ignore the previous comment, and read the mononoke review

Triplettes of Belleville

2006-03-06T13:11:00.000-05:00

All right, folks. I know anime has a connotative value for only Japanese animations, but believe it or not, other country makes animations too. It's a shocking news for some, no? This animation that I will talk about is actually French, with American satire. But fear not, there are no French spoken during the film. In fact, nothing is said throughout the movie. And yet, it's voice is pure as a toilet bowl that has been just cleaned...WITH YOUR TONGUE.

Let us commence:
Visual quality- the drawing is not clear, and it has a sense of shaded, gloomy tone. It's exactly what it should have. The scenery is nicely drawn, with a sense of surrealism. The characters are drawn with an overly exaggerated posture. There is a transition from old style (mickey mouse style) to more modern, realistic and somewhat depressing art. I would, in the end, give it a 16. The only problem is that the IT WOULD CREEP THE HELL OUT OF YOU IF YOU WOULD SEE IT FOR THE FIRST TIME..But it's art. One of the coolest scene in here is when the old lady threw in a grenade into a pond to go fishing. That scene would make you go: That was the coolest scene! (Actually, that's not the coolest scene. I would tell you, but if I did, I'd get my ass kicked by the producers for ruining the story) (Not that I can't whoop them back or anything...)

Plot: There really isn't much of a plot, and this movie relies mostly on sentimental values rather than story. I mean seriously, I can pretty much sum up the events in this movie in what... one sentence. Yup, you better watch the movie if you think I'm lying. Just go to www.free-movies.com/tripletofbelville to pirate the movie and be cursed by many movie producers for doing such act. Did you click the link? It's fake. Shame on you for trying to download an illegal movie. Anyway, I would give it 36, because it's still damn funny to watch grandmas throwing grenade around. Can't say anymore, because I'll get pummeled by the director.

Characters: Each character is not represented, not developped by dialogues nor actions, but by their physical deformity, and their portrayal through artistic means. For example, the main character's grandson, (the tall skinny guy above) has a gentle soul, and so sensitive, yet is a hardworking man. One scene shows him as a horse like character, as his rides his bicycle like a slave. I give this portion 27, because some of the characterization could have been expanded.

Music. Like I said before, there are no dialogues in the film. Instead, they are replaced by musics that are both different in genres, and also some you have never heard of before. After all, one of the main characters, the triplettes, used to be singers earlier on in the film. The music ranges from classic, to jazz, blues to polka, Italian to French, and that's what makes it work. The most impressive music is done by a Vaccum cleaner, a refrigerator grid, bicycle wheel, and news paper. That is it, and it is one of the awesomest thing you'll ever hear from common household items. For orignality, for creativity, and excellent music that you can hum and whistle by after you finish the movie and going to your friend's dog's funeral, (meaning it's memorable) I would give it a bonus of 13 points.

So, I guess the grand total of this movie would be... 92! Pretty good film. You should check it out!

Neon Genesis Evangelion

2006-03-03T22:29:00.000-05:00

So lets see Evangelion......This is probably one of the most enduringly popular anime, ever. It's still huge in Japan, has had like five different DVD releases here, two movies, and it was all aired, in Japan, in 1995-1996. I have to say I really like this show, the plot revolves around how humanity deals with the coming of "angels", (or "apostles" as they are known in Japan) who aren't exactly pleased with humanitys conduct on earth. There are alot of cool pictures of this show, so bear with me, because I want to show alot of them.

So how did it do?

Visual Quality-17 points. The animation studio Gainax did a great job with this show, I really like the character designs. However, after some extreme violence in one of the episodes,and many many many complaints from viewers, the funding for this show was cut, and the animation took a dive after that. Seriously the last two episodes are a bunch of lines, and some crayon drawings. Points are deducted there. Also this show has a lot of fan service, I am not too pleased with this, and the show loses points there also. If you don't know what fanservice is click here, I don't feel like explaining this.
Plot- 38 points. Evangelion starts out as a standard anime, kill the invaders, try to live through a crazy school life, etc, but soon it begins to morph into something alot deeper. The seemingly pleasant facade of the first few episodes, is soon shattered, and things get really dark. Intense graphic violence, disturbing images, and pschological drama all combine to create one really really crazy show. I first saw a little of this show when I was 11, and I was tramatized. Yep anime sure is good for kids to watch....right Kent?

Characters- 27 points. Yeah you know something is kind of wrong when you end up liking the antagonist in the show, and are extremely annoyed with the protagonist. That is how I walked away from this show, and that is where the majority of points are deducted here. However the rest of the characters are really well developed in this show, and that is why it keeps the majority of the points for this category.

Music- 9 points. I really liked the music here, and it ranges from j-pop to classical music to Frank Sinatra, oddly enough. The ending themesong really really REALLY sucks, it is basically a bunch of Japanese actresses singing "Fly me to the moon", and it makes you want to take a sledgehammer, and smash the tv, then your face. In all fairness I would probably be just as bad if I tryed to sing in Japanese.

So how did Evangelion do?

Visual Quality-17 points, Plot- 38 points, Characters- 27 points, Music- 9 points.

Overall score-91 points

Hey everyone, I have scoured the internet for the best pictures of the angels from Eva, and have compiled all the images in a blog. Please view it.

Click here to see the pictures

God's in his heaven all's right with the world.

The Big O II

2006-02-27T01:21:00.000-05:00

All right many of you may wonder why I am reviewing Big O II, and not Big O I. Well the short answer is "NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS B***H".

Big O II has one of the most inventive concepts in the Giant Robot Genre of anime. This quote from anime academy captures the gist of it, "Forty years ago, an unknown event left the citizens of Paradigm City without any memories."

With the introduction over...."IT'S SHOW TIME"

Visual Quality-18 points. The character designs for this show are awesome, They don't look anything like the usual anime designs, in other words they are creative. The fight scenes are well put together, and the coloring is much improved over Big O I. There is no major flaw with the animation, but it just doesn't have that extra punch needed to get a perfect score.

Plot-36 points. One of the big problems I had with Big O I was that the episodes were all one-shots, and went through the villian of the week cycle. Fortunately, unlike Big O I, Big O II has more of a story. Background characters, from the first season, return with bigger plans, and the villian of the week trend is largely eliminated. Many subplots are incorporated, and overall the story is very good. However, I had some trouble understanding several of the romantic subplots, and the ending is just plain wacky.....Ha wacky that's a funny word.

Characters-27points. One of the upsides of Big O is that it has a well developed cast. Most of the focus is placed on the main character Roger Smith, but the supporting cast is also well developed. Many new characters are introduced in this season, and their backgrounds are mostly neglected, which is the only downside to this show's characters.

Music-7 points. Most of the background music is pretty cool, but it is repeated alot. The opening theme song kind of sucks. It's mainly a chorus of people saying "Big O.....Big O Big O BIG OOOOO".

All right lets see Visual Quality-18 points, Plot-36 points, Characters-27 points, Music-7 points, what could this possibly add up to?

Overall score-88

Princess Mononoke (Revisited)

2006-02-17T19:39:00.001-05:00

Ok the first time I reviewed this, I think I was unduely harsh on it. After watching the movie again, I decided to tweak the points awarded, and increase the grade. Originally I had awarded mononoke a 91.
Well I have been wanting to review this movie for about a week now. After just viewing it less than half an hour ago all that I have to say is wow. This is an amazing work of art, and I highly recommend it to any movie fan. With the intro over lets get on with the show.

Visual quality-20 points. This is a movie by Studio Ghibli, with a very high production value, if anything this should recieve more than 20 points. Everything from the epic battle scenes to the visuals of the forest gods, looks amazing. This is definetly one of the better animated movies produced by studio Ghibli.

Plot-39 points This movie is pretty good for an anime movie. Usually anime movies will not make any sense *cough* Akira *cough*, or they are so stupid that they bore you to death. The pacing in this movie is excellent, with a well balanced series of revelations and twists, there is almost no downtime in this movie. The only fault I had was that the beggining was a little slow, but the rest of the movie more than makes up for it

Characters-24 points If there is a flaw in this movie it would be with the characters. You don't really know anything about them. Sure you have an idea of them, but no past is revealed at all. The movie could have devoted a few scenes to background info. However, the movie is saved by some good lines, and interesting interactions, one of my favorite parts of this movie is that thereis no clear cut bad guy, everyone has somewhat noble intentions.

Music-10 points. the music in this movie is extraordinary. Once again since this is a feature length production, with a feature sized budget, the music is of a great quality. This soundtrack is fully orchestrated, and is appropriate for every situation it is used in.

So lets add up the scores, and see what I have given this amazing movie.

Visual quality-20 points, Plot-39 points, Characters-24 points, and Music-10 points.

Processing.....PROCESSING

Overall score- 93

Fullmetal Alchemist

2006-02-11T14:08:00.000-05:00

Fullmetal Alchemist

All right as anyone who has read a few posts on my blog could have figured out, I really like Fullmetal Alchemist. This is one of, if not the best anime series out there.
Since this is the first post in my new Anime is Blasphemy blog, I will go over my review system.

Animes will be graded on

Visual Quality-How well the show is animated. How does it look. A total of 20 points given here

Plot-Does the story make sense, does it make you think, does it seem well written. 40 points can be recieved here

Characters-after the show can you remember more than 3 character names, better yet can you say anything about their personalities. 30 points can be recieved here.

Music-Very important to animes. I'm not that big a fan of J-pop, but good music in an anime sure is nice. A total of 10 points can be given here.

So with the exposition over lets get on with the show.

Visual Quality-18 points. This is one of the best looking shows around, and the battle scenes are so well done, that you often find yourself staring blankly at the screen trying to absorb all the awesomeness. Sometimes some episodes seem better animated than others, but this only occurs in the middle of the series. Overall Studio Bones, an animating studio, has outdone themselves with this show.

Plot-37 points This is where Fullmetal Alchemist really stands out from the rest of the pack. I would say that this show would be near the level of the writing on Lost. The story line constantly builds on itself, and there are very little filler episodes. An even more amazing feature of this anime is how many secrets can be revealed to the viewer if they watch carefully. Either through careful writting, or extreme foresight, every revelation in this show makes sense. Little hints are dropped throughout the story, and looking for these hints adds greatly to the show's replay value. Only problem I had, was that some of the relationships could have been explored more.

Characters-30 points. Just about every character in this show has some significant impact on the story. The brothers Ed and Al, are the most developed by the end of the show, but side characters also are developed. It would be easier to name the characters that this show did not develop than the characters that they did. Out of all the characters, the ones that seem to be the most neglected are mustang's troops, and one or two of the homunculi. Otherwise.......amazing.....perfect....flawless. Next category.

Music- 10 points. This is also an area in which fullmetal excels. The entire soundtrack is fully orchestrated. The music is catchy, and the opening theme songs are some of the best I have seen in an anime. Enough said

Overall score- 95